Student Devastated to Find Out His Tweets Aren’t That Funny

Previously convinced that his 43 followers were hanging on his every word, student Josh Mitchell was found distraught after his friends told him that his tweets really aren’t that funny.

“I work really hard on my tweets, I think about them for days and factor in things like relatability, longevity, and political connotations.”

“He once tweeted, ‘Eatin’ a corndog,’ with the shrimp emoji and got like seven likes. That’s probably his biggest tweet,” said long-time friend Sarah Paulson. “Every time he tweets, he makes a big deal about it and tells everyone to go look at it. It’s kind of sad.”

Mitchell has not spoken to his friends since they insulted his social media skills last Friday. “This is really hard to deal with. What am I good for if my twitter isn’t lit as hell?”