Macbook User Elegy

Written in iambic pentameter.

In class, in meetings, in all of my work,

When do you, Macbook, find yourself silent?

As soon as a hush falls over, you lurk

And with a yawn and a scream most violent –

Heads swivel and turn to my blameless desk,

As fans whir over the crowded lecture,

Creating something that feels Kafkaesque

And leaving me with useless conjecture.

It’s old, impossibly old, this device!

I got it when I was merely a teen,

A year in highschool, at a modest price,

And Apple hardly cares for their machines!

And yet – my Macbook! You lived through it all!

My heartbreaks, failures, and heard-earned As,

Forgive me if I forgot to forestall,

When you are hardly a jack-of-all-trades!

You putter and stutter as you load up

The most menial of browsers and tabs.Sometimes I feel as if you will blow up

Or that you’d be better studied in labs.

But when you work (you hardly ever do) –

I’m relieved to save you from the death-knell

One day, I know, your old screen will turn blue

And then, dear Macbook? I’ll see you in hell.